Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I Wouldn't Want To Paint It

It's a small world. (I just coined that phrase. Catchy, huh? I see
t-shirts...merchandising...getting Disney involved in some capacity...)

Supposedly over Labor Day weekend, I was sent a text message by Jeff Cockey. (He says he sent one, but I did not receive one. Either he did not send it or -- a more likely scenario -- he sent it and due to my complete lack of texting ability, I deleted it by mistake.) (Aside: Once, when I was due to pick Cockey up from Dulles airport, he texted to let me know he arrived so I could come get him. I wanted to let him know that I was on my way, but had no idea how to text back, so I pressed "reply" and then something like "QYR98621."  He wasn't sure if I had been abducted, was drunk, or if I was just completely technologically retarded.) He (correctly) went with option "C". (Although "Both B and C above" would also have been an acceptable answer.)

The Labor Day text was to let me know that he was at a party in Hermosa Beach, California, with none other than one of my ex-boyfriends (who lives on the East Coast and was out there visiting). Somewhere in between guzzling bad beer and ogling girls on the beach, they put it together that they both knew me.

Jeff Cockey -- he's the new Kevin Bacon.

20 comments:

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Quite apart from anything else, 'Cockey' is just a kick ass name!

:)

lisa percy said...

just a quick note to let you know that you are on my google homepage and I read you all the time. :) maybe see you and canetto soon?

dilettante07 said...

I think that technically YOU are the new Kevin Bacon. Sprout!

Brutalism said...

VA -- No kidding...especially for an actor (which he is). He should hang out with Dr. Wolf (my cats' vet).

LP -- I'm so glad you're a reader. I will take that as a high compliment as you are one of the funniest people I know. (Canetto says "Hi")

Tante -- I need to go back through some of our back 'n forth texts to find the real gems. You have definitely been on the receiving end of some of the most ridiculous. That's a whole other post.

wwjd said...

I dont understand why you think its funny to talk about sleeping with so many guys. do you want avry to grow up an be slut like her mommy? swinging is a dangerous way of life to and you talk about that to much. I feel sad for you're daugther and pray for her. I not reading about you trashy life any more.

Dilettard07 said...

I don't understand why you think it's funny to talk about sleeping with so many guys. Do you want Avery to grow up and be a slut like her mommy? Swingin' is a dangerous way of life to <- del and you talk about that too much. I feel sad for your daughther and pray for her. I am not reading about your trashy life anymore.

Sorry, the editor in me...

dilettante07 said...

Awww c'mon. Swinging is only dangerous if you pull my husband's key out of the fish bowl.

Lighten up, wwjd, it's called entertainment.

Maybe you should go sleep with some guys.

wwjd said...

How suprising that you're fans are so pompice an criticize me for my grammar when they know Im right about there morals!!

You may think its funny to joke about these things, but its people like you that raise bad kids who make my kid come home crying every night because they tell her its dumb when you want to stay chased and not give it up any Tom, Dick or Harry who comes along.

Im praying for all of you.

Dilettard07 said...

A discussion of morals aside, what is at the heart of your characterizations of the actions of the host of this blog and anyone else here is simply false, although I can only vouch for those I've met in person (I have to confess, I suspect some of the fans here whom I have not met are indeed rather wicked). I can tell you they are pretty tame people. Rather boring, really.

Were I guilty of the lifestyle you accuse us of, I would not deign to be their friend (because I'd think myself too cool), and vice versa (because they'd rightly think me an asshole--though they'd make fun of me here on this blog).

In other words, the "trashy life" you refer to is an illusion; don't believe everything you read here. It is simply the musings of a wannabe. Someone who grew up a totally self-conscious, chaste geek and is now having a laugh at random things and looking--in a detached way, mind you--into the real-life soap opera/carnival sideshow that is the world around us (particularly the World of Ashburn). This blog is kind of like Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. Only, some of the animals wear merkins.

Like you, we (well, most of the we; based on the pic he uses the jury's still out on Badass Geek) don't condone, for example, swingin'. The difference, at the end of the day, is that we just entertain ourselves--at a safe distance, mind you--and have a laugh at it and those who partake.

Brutalism said...

Actually, Tard -- I think it was nice for Kirk Cameron to stop by and join the Brutalism party.

Jason the Absurdist said...

I'd bet dollars to donuts that wwjd is a troll having a laugh at those taking his/her posts seriously. I've seen bad grammar and spelling. I've been guilty of it a few (trillion) times myself, but this is too exact not to be deliberate.

The "Tom Dick or Harry" was a step too far. I call your bluff, brave sir or madam. Show yourself!

Jason the Absurdist said...

Wait.

You're NOT a swinger?

The stuff here ISN'T true?

I am so outta here, illusions shattered, dreams smashed, fantasies uhm... fantacided.

Dilettard07 said...

I dunno, Jason. You've never read an email from my mother. Unless...

Seriously, I was surprised "morals" was not spelled "morales." So you are probably right.

dilettante07 said...

morels would be tastier

Brutalism said...

Jason - I'm totally a swinger. Just ask your dad. (Over the line even for me?)

Tard - Speaking of e-mails from your mom, are you getting enough fiber? (er, fi-BAH?)

Tante - You say morals, I say morales, you say tomato, I say Former Senator Alfonse D'Amato...

ShutUpandRun said...

YES! This back and forth has been really entertaining. I wish WWJD would visit my blog b/c I'm sure he/she would have some judgments to make about me. "What kind of example are you setting for your children when you shit yourself while running," or something like that.

Brutalism said...

ShutUpandRun - I can only imagine what our new friend would have to say about your site. I love it, which of course means that you are evil.

Ri, the Music Savvy Mom said...

Oh, GREAT.

If I had known I'd miss this ill spelled, poorly punctuated and grammatically challenged attack on you and your would-be key swapping peccadillos, I'd have TOTALLY blown off the conference this weekend.

I miss ALL the good stuff. *sigh*

Brutalism said...

Ri -- Just some unknown crazy thrown in there with the known crazy -- so you didn't miss too much.

Ann's Rants said...

Wait Jeff Cockey...

Wasn't he in that one with Melissa Gilbert? Or no, it was Tawny Kittane?

Damn I always confuse them.

Thanks so much for your comment on WOW today. I really appreciate that.