Wednesday, September 14, 2011

This Makes Me Craugh (Combination Cringe/Laugh)

My last post took me down that best-left-repressed memory path of guys with whom I was involved in the past.

(Not that there were lots of them -- I was a champ at dating boyfriends for YEARS beyond our expiration date as a couple.)

However, during a transition time for me, I dated a guy that I had known for years. Because I had known him so long, it was kind of like dating my brother. If my brother was Jewish and I had sex with him, that is.

One night, we went to a Washington Wizards basketball game at the arena in DC, and had several beverages prior to and during the game.

So I was probably way more animated than I should have been when I spotted my friend, Simon, about twelve rows ahead of us. I jumped up and down and screamed his name and waved. I certainly had the attention of the people in the rows between us, and finally got his -- so he turned around and stood up and waved back.

Which is when I took the opportunity to scream to him (and the twelve rows of people between us):

"HEY, SIMON! THIS IS THE JEW I'M {verb for coitus that my husband found offensive}!" while pointing at my date.

10 comments:

Moooooog35 said...

At which point Simon says, 'Oy.'

Abby said...

I'm glad you clarified the "Cringe/Laugh" aspect of your title, seeing as my first thought led to Crap-Laughed...

Brutalism said...

Mooooog - Simon's response when I told him how embarrassed I was the next day? "It's okay...no one could really hear you over the woman in front of you who was screming about the Presbyterian she was bonking."

Abby - You're welcome. ("Linge" sounded awful.)

Ed - Sorry for the technical difficulties. I should learn to run this stuff by Canetto before posting. Sometimes he is not a fan of how much I share.

Narm said...

You should have told it as a joke -

A Jew, a Catholic and an Atheist walk into my bedroom...

dilettante07 said...

Really? Canetto (aka "there's no line I won't cross Man) objected to bonking? It's like someone has taken over his body.

dilettante07 said...

BONKING BONKING BONKING

Chantel said...

HA! I am so adopting "craugh" into my vocabulary. (can I use that in scrabble?)

BlackLOG said...

I think most of my life could probably be described as bing lived in a state of Craugh... Not so much for me but certainly the people I interact with (and when I say that I don't mean the verb for coitus that your husband found offensive).

A Lady Reveals Nothing said...

I'm so glad you didn't say 'porking'.

Simon said...

Having spent my first few years in the US as a goy-toy to several jewish girlfriends, I guess he was just being the ying to my yang. (which I guess is just a couple of steps from being the wing to my wang?) Anyway, I still remember the look on the guys face - did not know whether to be proud or embarrassed. Let's go with prou-assed. I just recall thinking I was rather lucky that this was one game I didn't bring a client to...