So to share this (uncharacteristically cheery) spirit with others, I am, for the first time ever, providing my very own gift suggestions, Brutalism-style:
Brutalism's First Annual Holiday Gift Guide (the 2013 edition):
1. An empty box. Sure, we've all kidded that after spending gobs of money on toys the kids actually prefer the boxes in which they come. What I didn't realize is that these boxes are now a commodity that go for upward of $20. I would suggest that you do not purchase this, but that you instead save any gift boxes from overpriced 18" doll crap your kids receive this year and fund the holidays for your family next year. You're welcome.
2. Pretty much anything from Stupid.com. I buy all of my daughter's stocking stuffers from this site because there is nothing more magical than the joy and wonderment on a youngster's face Christmas morning when they realize their stocking is filled with (fake) dog doo. (Why just last night, a fine gift from Stupid.com was presented to me by a fellow Dilettante:)
|Lederhosen! For beer! This is the best Christmas, ever!|
|Oedipus....Schmedipus....at least he spends time with his mother.|
|I know what you're wondering: a) I'm Team Zayn and b) All I wear to bed is Derek Jeter's Driven cologne.|
|...okay, probably not.|
|I also need an attention span. And so you know: it's been three years now...|
|Guessing Mr. Brutalism is feeling pret-ty silly right now for referring|
to the cigarette holder purchase as "frivolous."
|Perhaps now is a good time to reconsider this gift guide considering my shared|
tastes and preferences.
|Seriously, Guys. Ever hear of an acronym?|
Hope you all have a peaceful, healthy, happy, fun and kindness-filled holiday season and new year,
UPDATE: And of course, thank you to DC Blogs for mentioning me in DC Blogs Noted. DC Blogs is the bounty bar in my foxhole. (If you will.)