On the way to meet some friends out in Arlington the other night, I was blasting "Mamma Mia" in the car. (I know...for someone whose favorite band of all time is the Ramones and I DO NOT MEAN THE "I WANNA BE SEDATED" RAMONES....I MEAN THE "I SAW THEM TWELVE TIMES IN CONCERT AND HAVE ALL OF THEIR ALBUMS AND HAVE BEEN LISTENING TO THEM SINCE I WAS 14" RAMONES...I do have a fondness for the show tunes.)
Canetto was in the car with me and thanks to my genetic pre-disposition to OCD, I have to listen to the songs I like most about 47 times in a row. As we all know, show tunes are only fun when:
a) everyone sings them and b) they are sung as Ethel Merman, in an operatic falsetto and in monotone, preferably all within the same song.
I handled the b) portion of the rules. Canetto was slacking in the a) portion, so I made it my goal to teach him the Abba "take a chance, take a chance, take-a, take-a chance chance" part while I sang the lead in "take a chance on me."
Ladies and gentlemen...based on his complete and utter massacre of this important part of the show tune, I can defnitively state that my husband is 100% heterosexual (not that there's anything wrong with that).