Some celebrate Easter by reflecting upon the resurrection of Jesus. Some celebrate with Easter egg hunts and lots of sugary treats. Still others celebrate by going to a special brunch in DC that provides entertainment in the form of men dressed in drag lip-syncing pop hits (Best. Easter. Ever.)
Me? I am a bit of a traditionalist and celebrate by crafting dioramas out of marshmallow peeps with my Jewish friend, Hillary.
For the past few years, The Washington Post has sponsored a Peeps diorama contest and for the past few years, the dioramas that Hillary and I have created have been ignored like the women at the above-mentioned drag brunch. (See how the Post ruined Easter for us last year and the year before, too.)
This year, were were so hopeful...what with our "Blue Peep Group" diorama on which we had worked so tirelessly...
...and yet, once again, we did not even make the finals. I think this year is when we finally make good on our threat of leaving a flaming bag of peep on the judges' doorsteps.
Resurrect THIS,
Brutalism
24 comments:
There are some things I would like to address about the Peep contest, one a critique of the contest judges, and the other a suggestion for you next year.
1) Gene Weingarten needs to be a judge for this.
2) Brutalism is successful because of the edgy, off-color humor. Channel that. Next year try a diorama of a flaming bag of peep outside a nice Potomac, MD, McMansion with "WashPo Magazine Staff" on the mailbox.
If 1) and 2) both happen, you will be a sure winner. If only 2) happens, you will be slapped with a restraining order. But that would be something else to blog about.
2 happens
As a public service announcement, I will suggst than anyone trying the flaming bag of peep maneuver light it AFTER arriving at your destination...not in the car on the way over.
Also, Hillary and I may have submitted our diorama to another publication in another metro area. We also have an alternate plan. We're like the A-Team in that way. Or the boy scouts. Or something.
The Blue Peep Group is AWESOME. I love that. How could that not win? This is why I should be judging this competition.
There has go to be a way to win the damn contest and not go to jail in the process.
But at this point you should go with choice number 2. Next year you should solicit idea via the blog.
I for one probably would have had a diorama with a wife peep beating on a husband peep with a peep sized nine iron and 12+ female peeps falling out of a Palm tree.
Ok if you are not making the finals, who the heck is? Jesus peeps on the cross? Good gried. I loved yours. As always, you crack me up.
It is very important to wait to light the bag of peep. Very.
I think the damn contest is fixed.
Maybe you can get some sort of lifetime achievement award in a few years even if you never win. Kind of like a participant ribbon (I collected many during my early childhood years). Not first place, but still shiny.
Maybe next time try Peep Benedict accompanied by three little see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil chimpanzeeps. I realize it'll be tough to capture that perpetual 'what's that smell' look he sports in marshmallow but could be worth the effort. If you can pull it off that'll at least get you the Catholic vote. Or not.
VA - And since you are an artist (extraordinaire), that means a lot. (Note to self: Somehow get Vegetable Assassin on Peeps judging panel next year...)
NoShare - ...and also include an Accenture executive Peep yanking away a Peep endorsement check...(nice thinking)
SU&R - Thanks! Based on your running stories (treadmill snafu, bathroom issues)...I may base a diorama on YOU next year...(I'll have to airbrush in the abs...Peeps don't come with those...)
Tante - Again, I hate to mention it, but that was a lesson learned the hard way. Was it so many participant ribbons you collected that you decided to take up rhythmic gymnastics? I thought so.
Daze - Peep Benedict is genius.
You should so a diorama called Harshing My Mallow.
It's Free - Not a bad idea. Especially since today's post title is probably my favorite, ever.
Future ideas:
"The PEEPing Tom" diorama (peep staring in the window of another peep taking her shirt off)
"PEEP show" diorama (self-explanatory)
"PEEP Wee Herman" (Peep in an adult theater spraying his marshmallow all over the other people)
I get artistic credit.
Moooooog - Awesome. Particularly the PeepWee Herman --
I'll definitely give you artistic credit. Sicko.
Reminds me of the Easter we spent hollowing out eggs, painting said eggs as different characters and then placing them in our Prison Rape Scene Diorama.
Best.Easter.Ever.
That is hilarious!! I totally think you should have won!- Signed, a bad jew who sends her kids to a Christian school where from they come home asking about Jesus every day
OMG! You guys were ROBBED! That is absolutely, without a doubt, the best peeps diorama I have ever seen.
(it is the ONLY one I've ever seen, but I'm just sayin' . . .
On a side note: how did you get the little moving eyeballs to stay on? A glue gun wouldn't have worked, I'm pretty sure.
Miss Spoken -- well that certainly makes drag brunch seems a little tame. Please tell me you took the diorama to an Easter sunrise service.
FGIS - I love that your kids go to Christian preschool. Though, it may be for the best. A Jewish friend of mine who sends her kid to Jewish preschool is scared he may turn into SuperJew.
Amanda - Funny you should ask, as the eyeballs were the hardest part. I used superglue (not to be confused with SuperJew above) and tweezers. And still managed to glue four of my fingers together in the process. I suffer for my art.
I'm not sure which is worse Super Jew or Jesus Fanatic??
BPG is now my wallpaper at work!
How about Peepocalypse, involving microwaved Peeps? Do they puff up all big and then deflate into hard wrinkly lumps like regular marshammlows? <--check out what happens when I look away whilst typing.
This is so cute!!! Ha! They are dyed really well. You seem the artistic type.
FWIW, I love your Blue Peep Group. ;)
But, some of those peep-o-ramas in the finalist category were freakin' amazing.
FGIS - Jesus Fanatic is always worse.
(Besides, Super Jew sounds like a superhero...I kind of love it.)
Mrs. Ohtobe - That almost makes up for the Post dissing it. Seriously. Thanks.
SMUK - marshammlows is a great word, actually. I almost typed "colonics" instead of "colonies" recently...usually the typos make for more colorful writing.
LSLW - That was about ten coats of shellac and four coats of blue paint. (My life is very exciting.)
ZenMom - Agreed. They all seem like they are done by professionals, they are so good. I read your post on these...loved the ones you highlighted...they were some of my favorites.
This is the post that made me subscribe to your blog.
UH-MAY-ZIIIING!!!
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