Sunday, September 12, 2010

Stand Back, I'm A Professional

Yesterday, I met with the editor of a publication that has hired me to write a regular column.

I will not tell you how much I get paid  per column because you will be so insanely jealous that you will never read this blog again -- it's lonely at the top start sending me your gently used clothing and household items in pity.

The column will be featured on an online community site in beautiful Oakton, Virginia, where I live. It launches on or about September 27th and I'll be writing once every two weeks, with a goal of moving toward a weekly column.

While I am a huge fan of nepotism in all of its forms, the thing that excites me most about this opportunity is that it had nothing to do with that. The editor stumbled upon my blog and contacted me without knowing me at all. [And because of that, was worried that I might think she was a stalker. Which I guess to most people is a bad thing (looking at you Leonardo "Mr. Fancy Pants" DiCaprio).]

The editor has assured me that I am allowed to write about swinging and poop (and everything else that happens in the 'burbs). I'm pretty excited about this and hope you'll check it out.

20 comments:

YinMetYang said...

Can't wait to read it! And you'd better be funny, or else...

Sarah Lindahl said...

That's awesome! Congrats! I can't wait to see it!

Dazee Dreamer said...

How awesome. Can't wait to see if they really let you let it all hang out.

dilettante07 said...

I'm so looking forward to your True Hollywood Story.

Brutalism said...

YMY - Or else what? I'm going to have to see only movies that Steve recommends for the next year? (ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha snort)

Sarah - Thanks so much!

Dazee - Thanks! Yeah...we'll see. She seemed pretty straight forward, so I'm hoping for the best.

Tante - I think Jeff Cockey should play me. Or Whoopi Goldberg.

YinMetYang said...

Or else I won't let you keep my kid at your house for hours on end on the weekends thereby giving me a chance to get my errands done and my husband some well-earned peace and quiet! (Not a threat, but a promise)

Gorilla Bananas said...

So what's the name of the rag? The Daily Butt-Plug?

ShutUpandRun said...

Because I love all things swinger and poop you couldn't keep me away from this new column. Only drawback is we can't leave our snide comments.

Brutalism said...

YMY - What you seem to have not factored into this is that your kid keeping mine entertained also gives US peace and quiet. Kind of a win-win. We are both geniuses.

Gorilla Bananas - I love the Daily Butt Plug.

...and I like your suggestion for the column name, too.

Ba dum bum.

Brutalism said...

SU&R - I'm hoping they have a comments section, as they are always the most entertaining part of any post I write.

And wait? You love poop? What?

kath said...

Since I did really actually know you when, I hope you will still speak to me. And when I say "speak to me," I do mean "steal all of my best jokes and use them in your new column." Go get 'em, girl.

lacochran's evil twin said...

You are living the dream, Chica! Congratulations! That's huge. HUGE!

Brutalism said...

Kath - Please. The blatant thievery of your genius is the foundation of our friendship. The fact that I have found a way to monetize it is just gravy.

lacochran - I feel like I need to develop some eccentricities if I want to be a "real" writer. Smoking cigarillos? Writing articles long hand on a legal pad? Wearing a fedora? Thoughts?

ZenMom said...

How exciting!!! Congratulations!!

I'm jealous. My stalkers never offer me paid employment. ;P

The Green, The Bad and The Ugly said...

Hooray!! That's fantastic!!!

Brutalism said...

ZenMom - I know. I have to say that my first stalking experience is a positive one.

GB&U - Thanks! I will also continue to be inspired by you, too. But you already know that.

dori said...

I think you should start referring to yourself in the third person as your eccentricity. Congrats! Couldn't happen to a more deserving person.

Brutalism said...

Dori - Brutalism thinks that is a fine idea and Brutalism intends to do just that.

Hippest Snippets said...

Congratulations! Don't leave the blogging world behind because we love reading your blog every day! We wanted to let you know!

Oakton, Virginia is lucky.

Brutalism said...

Thanks, Hippest Snippets -- and back at you. I wouldn't leave the blogging world behind, Brutalism is like a baby to me. A colicky, spoiled baby whose paternity I question, but still my baby.