The Gift of the Pants

I received two fantastic gifts this Christmas (and one that was not-so-terrific: a dead mouse under the tree courtesy of my cat, Dexter. One one hand - gross, on the other hand - he's an indoor cat and still managed to find something we did not already have). But I digress.

My kiddo, who we affectionately call 'the Pants', presented me with these:

The 11 best memories was actually for both my husband and me (the 'you crazy people' referenced in the photo above) and included the following (with my comments in parentheses):

• When we were dressed as Santas and ran a 5k to be in the 2018 Guinness World Record book [Your grandmother suggested this nonsense - and also suggested that had we planned ahead, we could have committed a crime during this event as any eye witness would only be able to describe the perp as "dressed in a Santa suit" (along with 5,000 others).]
• When we had to wait in line forever at the Four Corners Monument (It was a billion degrees and we had to wait about 90 minutes just to stand on some cement and take a photo - and yet, we really did have fun waiting, didn't we? And not only because one of the artisans with a stall there had the last name 'Dukeypoo'.) 
• When we saw the bats in Texas and when we were waiting to see them (it's weird that waiting times are some of our most fun...Tom Petty was so, so wrong)
• When Mom and me were laughing in the car about the Toffifay commercial and then went the wrong way because we were distracted (all fun and games until Mom crashes the car because of a Toffifay commercial) 
• When we saw the Avett Brothers in concert (and I was worried you'd get high because we were at Red Rocks in Colorado - state motto: you don't need to ask what time it is, because it's always 4:20)
• When we played chess and Dad beat me but it was a really fun game 
• Every time we've been in the car together 

The 52 reasons she loves me (each reason on its own playing card in a deck), included these (with my commentary in parentheses):

• You like to watch me play volleyball (I really like to watch you have fun and work together with your teammates - and to get so tense during some points I cannot watch the game)
• You always make me smile (back at ya)
• You tell me you love me about 15 million times a day (bonus for the hyperbole - you are my kid)
• You are one of the funniest people I know (and you are one of the funniest I know - and I'm old so I know a lot of people)
• You always smell good
• You always support me with everything I do 
• You let me into our family decisions (well, we DO need a voice of reason...)
• You keep me and Timmy safe
• You tell me what is going on in the world (even when it pains me)
• You like my friends enough to make a color-coordinated gift for them (you have great friends)
• You respect me like you would another adult (more, actually)
• You keep our family in order
• You listen to my opinions and ideas (because they are original and creative and so YOU)
• You don't treat me like a child
• You buy stupid things like "roll the Christmas pudding" (I always will)
• You come to all of my events (I always will)
• You do a great Ethel Merman impression (this has been career-boosting)
• You can't sleep if there are less than 4 rolls of TP in the downstairs bathroom (OCD is real)
• You love our kitties enough to put things in their stockings (and they love me enough to leave dead rodents around the house - I think they win this one)
• You don't let me do stupid and crazy things (not as much as dad, which is why all of the head injuries have happened on his watch)
• You always make time for me (you are my favorite person)
• You laugh at my jokes and impressions (they're hysterical)
• You love me no matter what (I always will)
• You make me delisious [sic] lunches for school (I do this to free up your time so you can study spelling - ooh...BURN!)
• You call me very sweet names like dolly, sweetie, etc. (because you are my dolly and sweetie)
• You like to cook and bake with me (I love it)
• You like to do analogies with me (analogies : fun ::  I'm terrible at analogies...)
• You can laugh at yourself a lot, by a lot I mean a lot (there is a lot of material with which to work)
• You take me to very exotic places (so we can wait in line forever, apparently...)
• You let me be myself (because yourself is pretty wonderful)

I didn't get her anything as thoughtful as this. Maybe I'll make it up to her by letting her stand in line for several hours...