Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Workin' Blue

On the way home from her preschool the other day, I asked Avery what was her favorite part of her day. She said to me, "When I told the other kiddos the one about my dog having no nose and also the one about Mickey Mouse's underwear."

I asked (after pausing to wipe away a proud tear at the realization that she had her first "set" and seemed to like performing in front of a crowd), "So you told them jokes? Did they think the jokes were funny?"

And she said, "Yes. Especially the one about the penis."

23 comments:

The Absurdist said...

What, no "try the veal"? or "Don't forget to tip your waiters"? What are you teaching this poor kid???

dori said...

oh my sweet jesus that is funny

dilettante07 said...

See--this is pure genius? Toddler comics telling knock knock jokes are a dime a dozen, whereas blue toddler comics are clearly the vanguard.

Maybe you can get her to memorize George Carlin's seven dirty words bit for the school talent show!

Brutalism said...

To be fair, the penis joke borrows heavily from the "dog has no nose" joke. It goes, "my penis has no nose...how does it smell? terrible." (I asked.) Now if you'll excuse me...CPS is knocking on the front door...

JenBC said...

Laughing so hard I'm (almost) textless. Pretty sure this is how Chris Rock got started. I guess raising a comedian is one way to keep her off the pole.

OneZenMom said...

She needs her own blog, stat!

Brutalism said...

I'm going to start instituting a two-juicebox minimum at all of her play dates. I'm seeing dollar signs.

The Absurdist said...

Imagine how much her friends' parents would pay for a little something extra in those juice boxes.

"Gee, Brittney is so well-behaved after Avery's shows. Her parents must be a wonderful, calming influence."

Everybody wins.

Especially AA.

Brutalism said...

I may or may not have instituted just that idea when I used to babysit.

Unknown said...

To be able to witness the fruits of your labor so early on, you are truly blessed.

The Absurdist said...

Is that why it took three weeks of chatting on FB for me to pick up on who you are? Wow, those must have been some hard core blackouts.

Now that I think about it this would certainly explain my affinity for rum punch....

Laura said...

That's pretty damn funny.

Sean Scully said...

Really, there is no way to tell an unfunny penis joke, is there?

My six year old prefers to simply call people "Bitches," which causes much angst among his Catholic School teachers.

Brutalism said...

Seanibus -- Totally. I believe Avery realized that once she had an audience, the way to bring it home was to close with a penis joke. A joke that made no sense, yet included the word penis. Brilliant. I've since taught her the "a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face?" joke She asked me, "Why is that funny?" and I said, "because a three year old is telling a joke about a bar."

I love that your son calls people bitches. Like Sister Bitch and Bitch Superior?

Ann Imig said...

Thanks for stopping by. I'd ask Avery to free-associate but I'm afraid her responses would be rated NC-17.

Jason said...

This is a funny humor blog that you have here. I have one myself and I would like to exchange links with you. Let me know what you think.

Sincerely,
Jason

JennyMac said...

LOL! Love it. A babe after my own heart.

Aidan Donnelley Rowley said...

Don't you love those hilarious moments when you realize that you are not just dealing with a child, but a tiny comedian, an artist, someone who might ultimately surpass you in wisdom in wit? I do. Alas, am a rookie in this big, bad blogosphere but I have stumbled upon your blog and it kind of rocks. Cheerio.

Dilettard07 said...

I'm embarrassed. I told Avery not to share that joke with anyone.

Brutalism said...

Tard -- So YOU'RE creepy Uncle Leon?

Dilettard07 said...

Please. I prefer "funny uncle."

I am just hoping that she'll give a performance on October 17. Aunt Tante and I will have to think of proper incentives.

dilettante07 said...

I hear she's both partial to- and running low on hot pink lip gloss.

Irene said...

I bet "the kiddos" were in stitches! Thanks for prodding me. I posted a minute ago.